Warp Speed Ahead!

Time is a strange thing. There is a poem that I read many, many years ago and it's one that I have never forgotten. 

"Time is too slow for those who wait, too swift for those who fear, too long for those who grieve, too short for those who rejoice, but for those who love, time is eternity."

Today was one of those "too swift for those who fear" days. Time is moving ahead at full speed and I am fearful that it's only going to move quicker. I just blinked and my oldest (Cole) went from being in Kindergarten to Jr. High today. Now I have to say that although I am sad that he is all "growed" up I am happy for him too because I know that he is embarking on a fun journey! I loved Jr. High! And I know he will too! He is on his way to becoming the young man he was destined to be! He is on his way to experience things that will stick with him for the rest of his life! I just really hope he makes each moment count and enjoys the ride!

I was already a boob today because of my baby boy moving upward and onward, so it didn't help that I also sorted out Sara's dresser drawers today! It was time to get rid of her small clothes and as I put each item that was too small in a pile, my heart grew even more sad. My baby, baby girl is growing so fast too! And soon, the baby phase that I love sooooo much will be over. There is no need for me to hold onto those tiny clothes, because I am slowly accepting that my baby days are over! I cringe even as I type this because letting go of that stage in my life is tough! If it were up to me, I'd have a thousand more. But our family just may be complete (unless divine intervention intervenes, wink wink). We have 5 beautiful children and as my husband would say, "Our quiver is full."

And if that wasn't enough to make me cry, it was Beck's meet your teacher day and it really hit me that he will be gone all day long being in first grade. Which then made me embrace that my baby girl Kate will also be going to Kindergarten. Lots and lots of changes, ones that I knew were coming, but now that they are here, I am dying! If Liam qualifies for services with the early childhood center then there is also the possibility that he will be heading to preschool this fall so that would mean that 4 of my 5 children will be in school. (I'm secretly hoping that Liam will not qualify so I can have him home for one more year.) But jikers! Where does the time go? I like the "but for those who love, time is eternity" part of the poem because it does give me hope that I will have an eternity to spend with those I love! I may not be able to rewind time but I can look to the future with faith that it will only get better.

Time is a strange thing. But I am grateful that I have this time to enjoy my children. Today has been a nice reminder that my children just want and need my time as much as I want and need theirs. And I, myself just need to make each moment count and enjoy the ride, warp speed ahead! 

Cole, Kindergarten 2006

Cole, 7th Grade 2013

Sweet Little CupKate

My sweet little CupKate just celebrated her 5th birthday! 5 years ago I was carrying a "surprise"baby. I love surprises so the unknown was very exciting. I was more sick than I was with the boys so I had my suspicions and when I was told that "it" was breech, and that my blood pressure was high, I was positive it was a girl because she was trouble already. My options were C-section or to try a "version" procedure where my doctor would try to turn the baby. I opted to try the version procedure first, knowing that "it" would turn and that I would have another natural birth. (I was pretty confident.) I had been told to pack my bags just in case that procedure put me in labor so in some ways I was ready to have a baby that day but not by C-section. The baby did not budge or want to turn. Once my doctor chose to do a C-section I had 30 minutes to prepare my mind. I gave birth to both of my boys with no epidural, no pain meds, nothing! So to be faced with the C word was frightening. Soon I was given a spinal block and wheeled to the OR. The last thing I remember was trying to pull the oxygen mask off my face and asking the nurse if it was normal that I couldn't feel my arms. That spinal block blocked all feeling. I was out of it! What should have been an elated moment of "It's a girl!" was a complete blurry moment for me. I remember saying "Oooooh"and that was it. I couldn't even hold or nurse her straight away because I was fearful that I would drop her. I couldn't even walk or get out of bed for another 12 hours. So my fears of having a C-section were realized. Once the meds wore off and I was able to hold my baby girl, I was in heaven! She was gorgeous! A feminine, more petite version of my boys. I finally had a real life dolly to love! I had a little girl to play dress up with. Five years later she is
still my dolly and still causing me trouble! Ha ha! She is just as girly as girls can be, diva as diva can be, sweet as sugar and as sassy as they come!

Kate's Birthday August 19, 2008

On her actual birthday we went to Lagoon amusement park. (It was also the Utah Down Syndrome Foundation Lagoon day.) And for her friends party, we went to a splash pad park and frolicked in the water and sun! It was a great way to celebrate and she had a blast!

Kate's 5th Birthday August 19, 2013

Lagoon

Kate's 5th Birthday Party

Happy birthday Dolly Kate! We love you Miss Love! We have been blessed by your sweet and sassy spirit!