Sunday, March 20, 2016

3 2 1 !!!

3 2 1! Rock your socks!




Tomorrow, March 21st is World Down Syndrome Day! 3/21 represents the triple copy of the 21st chromosome that occurs in Down syndrome. It is day of recognition and acceptance for those who have a little extra. We sure love everything about Sara, especially her extra sweetness! Please join us and wear mis-matched or crazy socks and when anyone asks "Why the crazy socks?" you can reply "Because I am crazy in love with someone who has Down syndrome!"

 
She's so sweet she's oozing with chocolate!! 

Thursday, March 17, 2016

I Get It!

"All you need is love" has been one of my many mantras. The Beatles were even inspired by my wise words and wrote a song about it. Another one of my favorite quotes is:
Believe 
there is 
good in
the world. 

There is lots of goodness in the world, but there would be less, unecessary sadness if we all chose to "be the good" and have love in our hearts. It really is a simple philosophy yet so many don't get it. I learned to love by being loved. And today I am teaching my children how to love by loving them. Now just because I get it doesn't mean that I see rainbows and mermaids every day of my life. "Love is all you need" just makes it easier for me to understand my purpose, to love and be loved.


I often post pics of my children on social media. Many times my posts are related to adoption, in particular, special needs adoption. It is no surprise that I have an interest in and a love for adoption because my life has been blessed by it, twice. I will sometimes use the hashtag #allyouneedislove. I use it because it truly is the reason I was touched to "be the good". My heart was pricked by love and a desire to help others through foster care and adoption. On one occasion after I had posted an adoption related post tagging #allyouneedislove, an acquaintance within my "adoption world" posted an entirely different post about how love isn't all you need. I honestly don't even remember who it was but I feel certain that she wrote her own post to contradict my own. I don't even remember what she said exactly but I remember thinking, "I hope I don't come across that my life is perfect and that adoption is hunky dory." Adoption is hard and there are times when love just doesn't seem enough but I promise you it is! Love is all you need to SURVIVE!

This particular person had just adopted an older child. And maybe that is another reason she was making a point, because I have no experience in older children adoption. But I get it even though my children were infants. A lot of abandoned children wear so many layers that it is hard to peel back every layer with love, I get it. Some kids are simply wired differently and it is impossible to rewire or reconnect the faulty connections, I get it! It is hard to like them when they are defiant or mean, I get it. It is hard to like them when all they seem to do is hurt those who are trying to love them, I get it. It's hard to like them when their stubbornness drives you to drink, I get it and I don't even drink! It is hard to look in their eyes and see their potential, because at times their eyes seem dull, empty and dark, I get it. These kids have lived a life of rejection and abandonment from those who were supposed to love them the very most so it is no wonder why it is hard to for them to love and be loved. Loving them can be hard work and sometimes you do need a lot more than love, you need patience, kindness, sanity, self control and anger management, lots of tear fests, and a night out with the girls. A long winters nap would be nice too!! I get it!

I get it because even though my children were infants when we adopted them, I surprisingly do have some of the same issues. There are times when I don't like my children. I love them fiercely, but they wind me up so much sometimes it's hard to want to be nice. There have been times when I have felt like someone else would be better suited to be a mother to my children. I have uttered the words, "I can't do this anymore". I have even questioned if we made the right decision. I never thought I would have these heartbreaking doubts but they're real. This is why adoption is love! It has stretched my ability to love even greater than I thought was possible and to love unconditionally. So the point I try to make when I use #allyouneedislove is that love is the key to get to the point of even wanting to help these children. You have to have love in your heart for your heart to even be stirred. Love is all you need to trust and take that leap of faith to change the course of your life but more importantly to change the course of a child's life. These kids need us! They need someone to reignite the light in their eyes so their soul can shine bright as it was designed to do! They have potential, they have a purpose and our purpose as parents, no matter where our children come from or how they are wired is to not give up on them! They need us as much as we need them! So love really is all you need to make this happen! It doesn't mean it's going to be easy. It doesn't mean that it is going to take away their behavior or their quirks. Love isn't going to change their diagnosis, but love is all you need to keep fighting! So although it will be tough at times, we have been promised that it will be worth it! "All you need is love" makes the blobfish and cloudy days bearable. Because at the end of the day if our children feel loved despite the hard stuff, they will love! Even if it takes an eternity! Thank goodness families are forever, because forever is a long time and hopefully it's enough time for all of us to get it!



If the thought of adoption has ever crossed your mind, or if you have ever felt inclined to help by fostering children, don't be fooled into thinking that you can't do it! Adoption may be part of your purpose. You don't have it have it all together to take the leap. You don't have to have a bigger house or more money. You don't have to wait until life quiets down. If we all waited for the "perfect" time to jump, then we'd all still be waiting at the edge of the cliff. We'd never experience the thrills that were designed for us. Children in need don't care what you drive, where you live, what you wear, or what you do, they just need a family who cares and who is willing to take a leap of faith. They need someone who get's the simple philosophy of "Love is all you need." Because it truly is all they need to realize their purpose and His plan. I am glad that through the rainbows and clouds, I get it and that adoption has been part of my purpose and plan!



Wednesday, March 2, 2016

Spread The Word......

......To End The Word!!

"Mentally retarded". "Mental retardation". Terms once used by medical professionals to describe those who had intellectual disabilities.  Today, these terms are being used to degrade and make fun of those who have significant intellectual impairment. Additionally the r-word has become a common word used by society as an insult for someone or something stupid. For example, you might hear someone say, "That is so retarded" or "Don't be such a retard." When used in this way, the r-word can apply to anyone or anything, and is not specific to someone with a disability. But, even when the r-word is not said to harm someone with a disability, it is hurtful. Please take the pledge today to end the word by clicking the red link below! Pledge to show respect to everyone!


In addition to taking this pledge, let's use people first language as well. What is people first language you might ask? Here is a reminder to help you understand.
    "Remember: a disability descriptor is simply a medical diagnosis; People First Language respectfully puts the person before the disability; and a person with a disability is more like people without disabilities than different!"
For example it's not polite to say "the Down syndrome girl" or she is "the downs kid" or "she's downs", or "my Down syndrome kid". She is Sara (people first) who has Down syndrome. Her name is Sara not Down syndrome. Sara has Down syndrome but it is not the Down syndrome that defines who she is. She is Sara! Likewise you shouldn't say "the autistic kid", he is a boy who has autism. You wouldn't call somebody Autistic Sam or Down syndrome Sara. You would call them Sam or Sara. Hope this clarifies what people first language means. It's just another way to show respect to everyone!

Today is also Dr. Seuss' birthday! So in honor of him as well as educating others about spreading the word to end the word, I would like to share this pic and quote.


Caring is another word for respect! Respect causes change and change begins with you!