Definition for suffocating:
1. Die or cause to die from lack of air or inability to breathe.
2. Have or cause to have difficulty in breathing.
Now why on earth would I have the definition of "suffocating" to start a blog post? After reading this definition I have to wonder why am I still alive? Sounds crazy but when I think of all the sadness in the world, it is very suffocating. The orphan crisis, AIDS epidemic in Africa, child abuse, homelessness, domestic violence, starving children, shootings and killings, the list goes on. All of these things take my breath away.
After hearing and watching today's news about the shooting in CT, I cannot stop sobbing. I first heard of it just minutes before my kindergartner was about to get home from school. I couldn't help but hug him a little tighter when he stepped off the bus. No one ever expects to send their babies off to school and have them not return home. Unfortunately this happened today. 20 children did not come home from school today. 20 parents did not get to greet their child when they got home. 27 families have been changed forever. These news stories are stories that I shelter my own children from watching or hearing. I am so sad that these 600 plus children who attended this school were not offered that same protection. They lived this nightmare and my heart breaks for them. Over 600 children have witnessed firsthand the devastation of a coward.
I don't know why but when things like this happen little details swarm my head. I can't help but think that like me, many of these parents had probably finished their Christmas shopping. There are going to be many unopened presents this year and that thought just makes me tremble. I can't even fathom what these parents must be feeling. This holiday season will never be the same for these families. Ugh! I just pray that they will receive the peace needed to get them through this troubled time. I am reminded that although I am fearful, fear is the opposite of faith. I may not understand why these things happen but I have to trust that it's all in His plan. I also have to remember that there is still a lot of good in the world. One gift that I treasure is the gift of my Savior. His love can comfort, guide, and heal troubles hearts. I am so grateful for my own testimony of Him and His love. Last night I had the opportunity to attend the Mormon Tabernacle Choir Christmas concert. As always, it was a night to remember and one of the verses of Hark the Herald Angels Sing sung by Alfie Boe is still echoing in my ear.
Hail the heav'n born Prince of Peace!
Hail the son of Righteousness!
Light and life to all He brings
Ris'n with healing in His wings
Mild He lays His glory by
Born that man no more may die
Born to raise the sons of earth
Born to give them second birth
Hark! The herald angels sing
"Glory to the newborn King!"
He lives! His birth and death allow us all to be saved and have eternal life. There is no doubt in my mind that these children who lost their lives today will live again. I look forward to the Second Coming of our Lord Jesus Christ and am sure that these beautiful children will be part of the angelic choir who will sing at His coming. They will rejoice and sing "Glory to the King!" I have a wish that God will speed His coming! I can't wait to have my breath taken away by something glorious and joyful! Prayers and hugs!